There are many, many, plus sides to living alone for the first time in my lifeâ€”I can organize the fridge to my exact specifications! I can walk around in nothing but a ratty college T-shirt and mismatched socks! I can come home unattractively drunk at 4 a.m. and microwave nachos without judgment!â€”but one severe downside is that Iâ€™ve been waiting for four days to watch the finale of Yellowjackets. Why, you ask? Because I work during the day, and I refuse to watch the show at any point close to nightfall. Itâ€™s that scary.
The Showtime series, about an all-star girlsâ€™ soccer team whose plane goes down, stranding them in the Canadian wilderness as they try to survive, has captured the worldâ€™s imagination (or the imagination of my Twitter feed, at leastâ€”potayto, potahto). And while watching the survivors (Christina Ricci, Melanie Lynskey, Tawny Cypress, and Juliette Lewis) attempt to figure out whoâ€™s sending them alarming reminders of whatever they did in the forest is grippingâ€”Juliette Lewis 4ever!â€”itâ€™s the flashbacks to their younger selves that Iâ€™m drawn to the most.
I donâ€™t know if this is typical or not, despite literally being part of a 70-person Yellowjackets group DM, but ever since I started watching the show, Iâ€™ve become obsessed with trying to determine how my friend group would fare in such an extreme and horrifying life-or-death situation. Iâ€™ve never been much of a prepper (my dad had to buy me a flashlight for my current apartment, explaining that I might find it useful in an emergency), but suddenly, Iâ€™m wondering if Iâ€™d be more of a berry-gatherer or a spear-fisher. Would I be a bold hunter like Natalie, or a team leader like Taissa?
Ultimately, my Yellowjackets ruminations always come to the same conclusion: I would be utterly useless out there in the woods. Iâ€™d be like Jackie (Ella Purnell), too concerned with getting my Walkman to work to notice that my friends were plotting a revolt against me for being wildly unhelpful at all times. Would I conduct a clandestine queer romance behind the backs of my peers, like Taissa and Van did? Iâ€™d like to think so, but to be honest, Iâ€™d probably spend more time crying and trying to find hallucinogenic mushrooms than connecting with my fellow survivors.